‘The inclination to exchange thoughts with one another is probably an original impulse of our nature. If I be in pain I wish to let you know it, and to ask your sympathy and assistance; and my pleasurable emotions also, I wish to communicate to, and share with you.’

-Abraham Lincoln, February 11, 1859

Why I blog:

  • Most of the time I feel like I’m living in a bubble, with people on the outside shouting their ego-related messages or self-covering smoke screens which I don’t feel like decoding all the fvcking time
  • To share things I’m excited about and once in a blue moon I encounter someone who’s equally excited about it
  • In the hopes of somehow finding a dialogue with someone that goes beyond what I ate this evening and what the weather is currently like
  • To train my language muscle, I suppose
  • To see what I come up with, I never plan what I write beforehand, so sometimes I come up with an observation I didn’t know was there. Especially in these ‘5 awesome things a day’ posts I’m forced to look for positive things
  • Because the people I love to talk with are either dead, ignoring me, too busy, literally thousands of kilometers away or pushing me away
  • Because even if you write people hand-written letters you don’t get a response, which is normal, times have simply changed. I guess people used to tell each other stories, now they flip on Netflix. I don’t know, maybe Netflix is better, I’m not one of those ‘things used to be so much better’ preachers. Things change, roll with them.
  • I have such a traffic jam in my head that only writing unclogs that jumbled chaos
  • It whiles away the time astonishingly fast, it gets me into a state of ‘flow’

Do I accomplish any of these goals through blogging? Hardly, but for someone odd reason when I start with something, even if it’s not going anywhere, I find it very hard to stop. an indication of this is that is my email adress, it’s been called ‘rigoreobstinato@hotmail.com’ for as long as I can remember. I’m also enigmatically drawn to historic examples of obstinacy. If I had to choose a nickname for myself I’d go for the Slovak word ‘baranidlo’, because while it does sound like something small, it means ‘battering-ram’.

Below you see Confederate soldiers throw rocks at their attackers, because they’ve run out of bullets. I get all emotional when I see this drawing, and I suppose that’s not something you can slip into an every day conversation, so I blog about it. It would be unrealistic to expect that this is now going to elicit the same feelings in someone else.

the-diehards-by-don-troiani

Maybe I also blog to show I’m not the autistic, introverted, communicatively inhibited suicidal looking weirdo -not a week goes by without someone feeling the need to label me ‘weird’-  you will meet in a tram, at work, in a shop. I’m really not dead inside. And despite almost invariably feeling gutted by several rusty bayonets, I’m still

I do apologize for a theatrical side to me that has still not found a better outlet than to do some rather pointless blogging.