I was recently told the following story.
A lady was in the car with her first boyfriend.
They were playing. He tried to kiss her, and playfully, she dodged his kiss, leaned back, he leaned in to try and kiss her anyway.
A car crashed into them.
She said she felt like she was responsible for his death.
She obviously isn’t, but I knew it would be pointless to try and convince her otherwise, so I just listened.
I can’t begin to imagine how this must have affected her.
She had more rather random negative experiences later in life, but all in all she was upbeat and fairly positive. Although she ended up with an entirely different life than she had imagined and was definitely punching under her weight. When she was young she had been well on trac to be a physician, but eventually she ended up doing one of those desk jobs that so many people have and that rarely – if ever – fulfill a person.
She wasn’t seeking help, so I just listened, which is usually the only helpful thing you can do anyway.