Dating Belarusian girls

Belarusia or ‘white’ Russia is called that way because it used to be a reservation for Slavic albinos. This reservation was set up by the Mongols to protect these albinos from shy, but shambolic shamanic hunters from Africa who like to use body parts of albinos to mix through their magic potions.

This is why Belorusian girls are still extra white when compared to other Slavic girls.

High on their bucket list is getting a tan.

So if you want to date Belarusian girls your best bet is to offer them a trip to a sunny country.

A non-African sunny country, cause their fear for albino hunters is still deeply engrained in their genetic make-up.

Other than this rather peculiar characteristic all the usual advice for dating Slavic girls applies.

To trigger her attraction you will have to try to look more ugly, stop smiling, be very direct and to the point. Eat more garlic. Wear trainers and sweatpants to go shopping. Tell her on the first date: ‘My car and my drinking buddies will always be more important than you. And I do not lick pussy.’

That way you will confirm what she has come to expect and she will most definitely swoon.

If not, try not to google dating advice. Most of it is useless and counter-productive.