• Thanks billionaires & Israel for funding my campaign
• Let’s say things moderate Republicans might like to hear
• I swear I am a member of some minority
• You can be sure I also think Bernie is crazy
• You have my absolute promise nothing will change with me in the White House
• I don’t rule out the possibility I will invade some country. Cause it’s worked so well for us in the past
• I know this pose makes me look presidential cause me and my team have been working on nothing else than making me look like I got this in the bag
• If anything goes wrong: y’all are racist, misogynist Putin lovers and not ready for me!!!