1. Hot knock-out MILFs

I do not know how they do it, but young Slovak moms keep looking like top models. Long legs, thin, hardly any stretch marks on their bellies… They also tend to have smaller breasts, which is a big plus for me, because I greatly prefer smaller breasts. Am a leg man anyway, and Slovak women have the best legs. Only Russians, Ukrainians and Latin Americans are even better. In the west I NEVER have sexual thoughts about mothers. Can’t remember a single one.

2. Slovak women bake cookies. Lots of them.

No western woman I have dated has ever baked anything for me. Over here you have to lock yourself up in your apartment and never venture outside if you wish to avoid them.

Slovak women bake cookies.

Maybe it keeps their legs long and firm…

3. Take off your shoes!!!

If you wish to become persona non grata instantly all you need to do is enter a Slovak home without taking off your shoes.

I think Slovaks would forgive a burglar if he could prove he took off his shoes before stealing all their possessions. No, of course they wouldn’t, this country would immediately vote to bring back the death sentence if the question was put to a referendum. This is not a very forgiving country. It’s a Christian country and as in all Christian countries with the exceptions of Portugal and Ireland perhaps, they do not practice what they preach and tend to verbalize the opposite of what Jesus taught. No worries, in practice they are sweet people.

4. Slovaks are sweet people until they get into their car

I have seen more examples of aggressive drivers in two years of Slovakia than in all my time in the west.

Slovaks are docile and fake machos with hearts of licorice and marsepan, but all their pent-up resentment and frustration gets vented as soon as a big steel monster like a car can be used as a screen for their otherwise submissive personalities.

Think of Slovaks as the opposite of Serbs.

There will be no Srebrenicas perpetrated by Slovaks, but it’s likely some angry driver will yell at you because you almost got turned into minced meat under the wheels of his car.

5. Horrible salaries, happy people

People around here are crazy enough to think they make enough money when they make 1,500 euro a month… Most people have half of that or even less.

If you are from the west and want to live here you will likely have to lower your standards very significantly unless you are a real entrepreneur (calling yourself an entrepreneur on social media without a huge income to prove it DOES NOT COUNT).

Again, am not sure how they do it, but Slovaks are happier than in the west, even though they are being exploited by the sharks who use them to get rich on the sweat of their brow.

Slovaks like to complain, but not even that much, almost all Slovaks I meet are cheerful. Apart from being obsessed about owning a house or an apartment and and a car, they are usually quite fine with making little money. They talk about money more often than in the west, but apart from being docile employees they usually have no idea how to make money and in the end they also totally lack the motivation to do so. Apart from a car and one piece of real estate Slovaks are not that materialistic. They appreciate small things. Religion serves to keep them content. Even the atheists have this spirit. The materialistically oriented ones are the exception. In the west people seem to value their posessions more than people.

This also means that Slovaks are waaaaay more baby oriented than in the west. This has nothing to do with being racist, the following is just a fact: in three generations white people will be in the minority in a country like Belgium. Young Belgians don’t breed.

Of all my close friends in Belgium only one has children. She was born in Ukraine 😉