We keep being asked this specific question, and we’ve finally decided to go ahead and answer it, even though we prefer the more delicate phrasing: how to know if a woman is aroused.

Guys, this list is pure gold, read it carefully, and be a good friend, share it with your mates. The fastest way to learn something is to teach it to others.

Here goes:

  • First of all: women are unique. Some women become very extraverted when aroused, some seem to withdraw and you would never be able to tell she’s aroused unless you’re so experienced with women that you can still tell… You will need to be very observing to spot arousal in women.
  • She will likely seek to be physically close to you. This is a difference in mere inches. She will just stand a little bit closer to you than a person normally would when talking to you
  • She will usually touch you, especially on the arm. She may use all sort of excuses to get to touch you. She may mockingly punch you, describe how someone else touched you by demonstrating it using your body, describe where she once had an injury and touch you there. In short, she will be remarkably creative in building closeness and getting to touch you, but almost always with…
  • plausible deniabilty. She will hint, she will suggest, she will give you plenty of opportunity to make your move, but she will almost always make sure that you can’t outright tell that she wants to be with you. When she loses her patience entirely and feels very comfortable around you, she might simply go and sit on top of you with her legs straddling you, without further warning, but this is not that common and you would be a fool to wait that long for her to make such an obvious move. Women will not be THAT obvious about their arousal. This is because for centuries our culture denied that women enjoyed sex, wanted sex or had any sort of sexual desires. Women to this day are deeply afraid of being labeled sluts and are still afraid to claim their sexual freedom. So be very aware of this. All these subtle signals are partly caused by this sad cultural inheritance and also because she doesn’t want to give you the opportunity to outright reject her. If it’s not that clear she wants you, if she doesn’t simply ask you to sleep with her, then you can’t reject her. You could see this as a coward strategy, but given how awfully we have and still treat women’s sexuality it’s a miracle women are still eager to be sexual. So applaud her for any initiative!
  • She will almost uncontrollably start flicking, touching or messing with her hair
  • She’ll have too much energy, and be visibly struggling with this energy boost. A highly aroused woman can also try to look as though nothing at all is going on, which can make her look tense or even mad, but this will not be the case on a date
  • She will -oddly- start drawing attention to her negative sides, on any level, physically, intellectually, emotionally, career-wise… A woman who’s in to you seeks reassurance from you that you like her and accept her as she is. They have the – weak, yes – reflex to draw attention to their bad sides. Just like men have the equally weak reflex to try and impress women they are attracted to. (Hint: do NOT try to impress women, they know it’s a sign of insecurity and see right through it. Do NOT brag about your accomplishments)
  • She might be open to drinking alcohol in your presence, even if she’s not the type that likes alcohol. She wants to loosen up and destress and she wants you to relax too and ‘get in the mood’
  • She suddenly has all the time in the world. There are no work deadlines, she doesn’t have to get up early, because wild horses couldn’t drag her away from you
  • She herself somehow manages to steer the conversation towards sex. Sometimes by the puzzling tactics of claiming you, as a guy, obviously have sex on your mind. No worries, if she starts claiming you have sex on your mind, SHE has sex on her mind
  • She’s giggle more easily
  • She’ll ignore any potential distractions
  • She’ll make lots of eye contact
  • She’ll prefer a setting with dim light
  • She’ll shut down in protest if you let yourself be distracted while talking to her
  • She might compliment you
  • She’ll tell you what ex boyfriends did wrong so you will know what to do. She’s likely to say what men do wrong in bed, so you will know what not to do when you sleep with her
  • She’ll ask you a lot of questions and will not just talk about herself
  • She will get this ‘hungry’, ‘longing’ look that’s hard to ignore, but that inexperienced guys fail to note and mistake for innocent friendliness
  • From time to time she will fall silent, but without leaving your side. A woman who’s not interested in you will take a long moment of silence as her opportunity to say goodbye to you
  • She’ll make time for you, even if she’s very busy
  • She’ll respond to your messages fast, and she’ll write long messages
  • She will almost certainly make jokes
  • She will LOVE to talk about entirely hypothetical situations with the two of you as the main characters. For some reason attraction and arousal brings out the natural story-teller in a woman and they absolutely love to dream out loud and create some crazy – the crazier the better – story about the two of you. This story-telling exercises to which you both add tells her a lot about your intelligence, builds excitement, tests how you will treat her, how creative you are, and all this at no cost, it’s a story, she learns a lot about you, can show you her needs and what she is like at zero risk, since it’s just a story. Guys with a rich imagination have an edge her. Even if they find it hard to attract women initially, they will sweep her off her feet as soon as they get to talk to a woman for a couple of hours. Why? Because female sexual arousal doesn’t happen so much between her legs, it happens between her ears.
  • Women really want to go at their own pace. Do NOT pressure them into anything. Gently guide them. Let HER tell you how to seduce her. Women always give you hints if you LISTENS. If you want to kill her arousal then just be impatient, controlling, nervous, whiny and/or pushy. Let her warm up at her own pace and she’ll turn into a volcanoe.

If you don’t feel a little engulfed by her passion you are doing it wrong.

This post was written for men who LOVE and ADORE women and want nothing but to give them pleasure. Use this list accordingly.


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